I gotta wonder if there isn't something else afoot here, I weigh 238 LBS and have the same headset I have been running for a couple years now, not a single issue, on 2 different frames.
As to the same spot giving out, honestly I wonder if something shifts or loosens while you ride, and then fully gives out when you land.
Can you post a few photos of your setup, the bearings that crapped out (if you still have them) your head tube from above and below (so we can see if it is out of round) and your fork steer tube where the lower bearing rests?
I am sick and tired of the "cliques" that this sport has recently developed. We should embrace the fact that we all ride a little kids bike, and not worry about the small details. When you take riding in its most basic form, we are all the same.